Lost Adventures, Found Mistakes

Sunset in Varsity Estates, as I walked home this evening. It was just before Halloween before I made my last post (Broken Social Scene aside), and it seems like long ago. The air grew cold, dew turned to ice and I became a solitary socialite by weekend night and a dvd-suckled sci-fi geek during the intervening working weeks. Halloween, on my way to the Ship and Anchor: During this time I've been dragging myself through my field placement with more than rudimentary concern but somewhat less than manic abandon. My work has come to fruition of late, however, and I feel like I've accomplished something. Working with immigrants has many rewards and I have been enjoying working more closely (at last) with actual people rather than voices on the phone and names on paper. I made out with a Canadian girl and finished our week-long meeting by calling her a 'fucking retard'. The Slaughter only goes out in style. A couple of weeks ago I was on fire, and like a hurricane of burning embers I flew through the Ship and Anchor charming my way into the hearts and minds of more than one fine young thing. "At last, a Break", my weary soul sang to me. The young fashion stylist and I arranged to meet again the following Friday. In the meantime, I lost my wallet, and after a half day of terror and pain, I found it again. The choir sang. The flowers bloomed. The team scored. The clouds parted and a million rays of golden sunlight fell upon me. I found my wallet, I really liked my new haircut and I was going on a date. 6.30pm at the Dalhousie LRT (that's not me in the picture. It would be really cool if it was). As the sun completed its ever-shrinking arc and retreated solemnly to the world below the horizon, the air grew cold. I dressed for the occasion with stern practicality met with gleaming style. I convened with my date, and with every passing hour, this meeting crumbled and fell apart like the splitting of an ancient block of cheese crushed between the fingers of a slowly tightening fist. I don't think I've ever been truly mooched from before. I expect that there are girls out there who expect that their 'date' will buy the drinks all night. However, after my awkward attempt at initiating a kiss was unceremoniously laughed off, and I recovered from my initial confusion and subsequent feeling of snubbed embarrassment, I no longer felt particulary accommodating of this little Snippet's financial incapacity. In fact i should have left at that point. It was only 9.30, I could have started over. However, that's not how it went and we left the Ship and followed the initial plan to meet her friends at a different venue. So. Present tense now. The door charge is $14 for both of us and I have to fucking pay that as well. As a token of gratitude, she buys us a drink. Of course the next two are on me. It continues like this until I realise that I'm spending my evening at a joint that evidently plays R&B music exclusively, with a girl who behaves like I have to stick with her and her stupid, fuckwit friends, but won't really pay me any attention and who already, basically, rejected me several hours earlier. A few drinks later, this all comes home to me. I've wasted my night. I've wasted $40. Perversely, I recall several instances of playful insolence which passed between us and decide to offer her one final insult: She is telling me that I look bored, and I laugh and say 'you know what?' She asks me 'what?' and I shake my head, with my best Brian Deckard smirk, looking away. She begs the question. I meet her petulant stare one final time and tell her 'You're a fucking retard.' She looks kind of offended and I think to myself, 'what happened to miss 'nothing offends me'?', and I'm a little drunk and I'm pissed off because it's 1am and I have to run to catch a train. Outside the temperature keeps dropping. I miss my train. In the cold, I wait for the last transport of the night. I realise that the bitch who killed my 'Found Wallet' vibe still has my god damned scarfe in her bag. It's approaching December. I have a show lined up at Broken City on November 29. This week began cold, and is now leading into a golden Chinook which will see temperatures climb into the mid-teens. The sun is shining.